There is a very real struggle being waged by many, one that can overtake every area of a person’s life. I’ve seen it in those I love, in friends and family members who before they mounted this battle I may not have believed it would be one they would wage. That is depression: overwhelming dark days that are intense and long lasting.

I was a teen in the early years of Roe v. Wade when a significant cultural change began. I don’t think we realized then how much impact a decision made by seven Justices of the Supreme Court would have on our lives. Pregnancy wasn’t ever present in our minds, but it was something we were trying to avoid, often rather ineffectively, given this was also the era of “free love.” In those years, an unwanted pregnancy had even more impact on a female’s life than it does today. Girls were labeled, often looked down upon, which didn’t make a lot of sense since they were not alone in their activity. They merely experienced the possible consequences that many others risked. It was as if once a month there was a drawing, and they drew the short straw.

There seems to be an unending list of articles on the subject of sex, from espousing general attitudes to detailing specific acts. Interesting though many of them are, I believe there is often one missing detail. The basis of great sex is not physical, it is relational. A satisfying sex life is based upon sharing your life and your heart, not just your bed.

So a large majority of your friends are married and you are not. Do you celebrate because you dodged the bullet or do you pine because you hate being alone? Do you dread the next plus one event or do you land at the door ready to have a good time, with or without that extra human by your side?

Being single is neither a malady nor a deficiency; it’s just a place in life. And it can be a really good place. So, how does one make sure it is?

Through the years I have hired (and fired) a lot of different people for a bunch of different positions. I’ve hired accountants, truck drivers, radio promoters, executive assistants, and even band members. The good news is the firing part didn’t happen often because I quickly learned the qualities I wanted in any employee.